OLDS - After taking a break for the summer, The Compassionate Friends (TCF), a support group for grieving parents, will be resuming monthly meetings next month.
TCF has more than 600 chapters across Canada. They give bereaved parents, grandparents and siblings a chance to meet, talk, share and provide each other with emotional support.
Olds resident Anissa Craig lost her 23-year-old daughter Kaitlyn in 2017 to a six-week battle with an aggressive cancer — vascular leiomyosarcoma.
“After she had passed, I began reading books on child loss. Hoping to find comfort, I came across a book by Ellen Mitchell called Beyond Tears. It was a book about several parents meeting at a Compassionate Friends chapter in the states,” Craig said. “I had met many grieving parents in the Olds area and felt there was a need to start a group.”
They meet on the first Tuesday of every month at 7 p.m. at Olds College, below the library in the Learning Resource Centre.
Meeting participants are encouraged to bring framed photos of their lost loved ones, whether for display on a table or to simply hold onto.
They start their meetings by gathering in a circle. Rules include keeping what's shared confidential.
“Jackie (Dinzey, who runs the group with Craig) and I introduce ourselves and tell our story. Then we gently touch the person to our left and they introduce themselves and tell their story if they choose to. There is no pressure to talk, as this is a safe place," said Craig.
“Some parents are very new in their grief and may choose to just sit and listen. Others are anxious to say their child’s name.”
They hope to get guest speakers as the non-profit group continues to grow.
Craig and her partner have put in their own money to run the group but are thankful to Olds College for providing them with a space to hold their meetings.
“Our group is non-profit and any advertising, posters, photocopies, coffee, snacks are paid for by Jackie and I, so it can get quite costly," she says. “We have been very blessed to have the college donate a room for us to meet which takes a lot of the stress off.
“In the future, we’re hoping to provide an Olds and area newsletter to our members which will include their child's birthday.”
Craig says a group like this is important to have in Olds so people to have a chance to share the memory of their child with other people who understand what they’re going through.
“After your child dies you are never the same. People are afraid of upsetting you if they bring up your child. But in reality, we always have them on our mind and our greatest fear is our child being forgotten,” Craig says. “At a Compassionate Friends meeting you are not judged. We have all been there; we know how you are feeling.”
For more information on the group, you can email [email protected] or find the group's table at the Olds Community Showcase, which will be held at the Sportsplex on Sept. 5.
