Honouring the forgotten at gravesite 118

WINNIPEG – For most of July 20 it had been overcast and blustery but at about 7:15 p.m. the skies opened up with an early evening sun bursting through the gloom, giving light and warmth to pensive family members at gravesite 118 in Brookside Cemetery.

For two young mothers, one from Winnipeg and the other from Calgary, this was a special pilgrimage, a matter touching the deepest vestiges of their loving maternal hearts.

“Walter Kravcenko, my grandmother’s eldest sibling, passed away almost 100 years ago at the tender age of only three months,” said Calgary’s Darlana Robertson. “Holding my own baby and looking at the grave marker was a cold, stark reminder how fleeting life can be and how fortunate I am for every moment I have with my son. My great-grandparents had precious few with their little Walter.”

Her cousin Nicole Lesko had just 40 minutes with her son Kieran before he passed away the same day he was born on Sept. 28, 2016. She did not want to miss this special family gathering, an event her father Brian helped organize. It was a Blessing of the Grave service for Walter, who died and was interred in near total obscurity in 1923. He was then almost totally forgotten for nearly a century.

Nicole Lesko with her seven-month-old cousin Andrew at the Blessing of the Grave service in Winnipeg on July 20.

“He was the forgotten infant, which was all too common then but still is today,” said Nicole. “Knowing how difficult the loss of a young child is and the stigma surrounding it, it’s not surprising to see so many young ones with unmarked graves in the section of the cemetery that Walter was laid to rest.

“The loss of a young one is very different from other losses,” she added. “Somehow people either devalue that short life or just do not know how to properly express this loss, as though there is no common way to deal with it other than sadly ignore that life.”

But her family’s Blessing of the Grave Service categorically proved there is a way to give powerful spiritual value to a lost and forgotten soul.

Father Roman Pavlov, rector of Winnipeg’s Holy Trinity Russian Greek Orthodox Cathedral – the same church Walter’s parents were married in almost a century before, arrived just before 7:30 p.m. He came fully prepared to bring back Walter to his family.

“After his death so long ago this three-month-old boy did a great thing. He brought his family together,” said Pavlov, who never before did a gravesite service where the subject had been deceased and forgotten for such a length of time. “This is a miracle, one with love for all family members. It means his little heart was full of love. He is like an angel.”

FINDING WALTER

And Walter was an angel in the eyes of his mother Jean (Geneva) Yadlowski, the second-oldest daughter of a devout Catholic immigrant family. At the age of 16 Jean fell in love with First World War veteran Peter Kravcenko in 1922 and Walter was conceived late that same year out of wedlock, a taboo scenario for most Christians a century ago. Walter was born in January 1923 but died just three months later, possibly from what is now known as SIDS, or crib death. The death certificate listed Peter as the father and his Winnipeg address but nothing for Jean, not even her name. There was no mention of a funeral service.

The family first came across Walter’s existence three years ago when his death certificate was found. Brian Lesko, the family genealogist, was passionately intrigued.

“Back in those days, no one talked much about such tragedies, especially to their children. That generation seemed to feel that life must go on and didn’t grieve for long,” said Brian. “This knowledge of a long lost son of Geneva’s initially aroused the curiosity of myself and my cousin, and eventually our desire to find out what happened to Walter and where his final resting place was.”

VIDEO
• For a full viewing of the Blessing of the Grave Service, see the video at the end of this story.

After searching several Winnipeg and area cemeteries, interviewing many church and cemetery officials, the pair finally located Walter’s final resting place last year in Brookside Cemetery, Western Canada’s largest cemetery with more than 200,000 graves.

But Walter’s gravesite had no marker. There was only a buried three-inch diameter concrete disc with the etched number 118.

“We tore away at the sod with our bare hands and a small trowel to fully expose marker number 118,” added Brian. “We were amazed. We were initially speechless. We were successful beyond belief in what seemed to be an impossible task.”

BLESSING OF THE GRAVE

 As Nicole Lesko lovingly cradled cousin Darlana’s seven-month-old son Andrew, a dozen family members, including some from as far away as Michigan, gathered for Father Pavlov’s service. It was a 10-minute two-part tribute that included the sprinkling of holy water, the burning of incense and the consecration of Walter’s gravesite -- newly adorned with a granite marker that included a prominent etched angel.

Family members at the Blessing of the Grave service for Walter Kravcenko.

“As we all gathered around my great-uncle’s newly discovered gravesite, looking down at the weathered grass beneath a large tree, the priest performing the final words of the Blessing of the Grave service, the wind started to blow,” said Darlana. “It was as if Walter was breathing a sigh of relief to finally be heading home.”

For Nicole, the service was proof that all lives matter, that the length of time living should never be a measurement for the right to be remembered, to be forever loved.

“It broke my heart his final resting place was previously unknown. He was somebody, and that deserved to be memorialized. He was someone’s son,” said Nicole. “It is something we all work towards preventing, having our child forgotten. I know Walter is smiling down on our family saying thank you for showing he was someone that mattered then and still to this day, regardless of his time on earth.”

For Walter’s living family members it could also be the start of a new beginning, one moving forward from a service that began the healing of an old wound, spiritual or otherwise.

Brian Lesko, the family genealogist, (with camera), chats with Father Roman Pavlov following the service.

“For the entire family this is a good point to start, a new life and a new relationship between family members,” said Pavlov. “Maybe Walter prayed for the family, and maybe his prayers are working because we are seeing the result of it. That is really what the miracle is.”

Johnnie Bachusky is the editor of the Innisfail Province. He attended the Blessing of the Grave service on July 20. Walter Kravcenko was his uncle.