Ending the cycle of family violence was the objective of a presentation by a former area woman who suffered years of abuse as a child and later as an adult.
Millie Mytton was on hand at the Olds Municipal Library talking about her memoir entitled Melissa, which details her life of abuse as a child and later abuse at the hands of her first husband. The story is told through the eyes of ìMelissa,î Mytton's imaginary friend she created as a child to numb her to the abuse she survived. The book covers 60 years of Mytton's life, spans four generations and talks about the effects of abuse and the recovery process that Mytton went through to overcome the abuse.
The book was self-published in October 2013.
Mytton was born in Olds in 1934 and raised on a farm southwest of Sundre. After years of abuse at home, Mytton was told to leave home when she was 16 and found live-in work. Later, she found work as a nurse and got married in 1954 to her first husband, who she describes as a ìprogressive alcoholic.î After years of more abuse at the hands of her first husband, Mytton divorced and then remarried in 1978.
ìMelissa's story is a lot about family violence,î she told a small group of family and friends assembled at the library on Jan. 7. ìIt's not until she is in mid-life that Melissa is able to deal with her monster.î
In an interview following the presentation, Mytton said she initially began writing the book in the 1980s as ìa way to get well, myself. I didn't feel good about myself and it never seemed to leave me.î Through therapy, writing the book, which was done over several years, and remarrying, she gradually began to heal from the years of abuse.
ìWriting the book was very difficult at times. But as I wrote, the more I wrote, I just seemed to (recall memories) and it felt like a cleansing,î she said.
Mytton also wrote about teacher Irene Halverson and how she helped Mytton by providing a place of solace at school, often allowing Mytton to stay in at recess, away from the other children.
ìThis was back in the '40s when nobody talked about what was going on at home, but she seemed to sense days when I would come to school and be very sad or sometimes I had marks on me and she would just kind of protect me by having me stay in and clean the (blackboards) rather than go out with the other kids and maybe have to answer questions. She was very alert to that and a very kind person. School became a real outlet for me. I loved school,î Mytton said.
As a result of her experience, Mytton volunteered for a women's crisis line. She hopes that by sharing her story, she can help people in crisis. She intends to do a presentation about her book at a women's shelter in Red Deer, hoping that some part of the book resonates with the audience. A women's shelter in Ontario ñ where one of Mytton's daughters works, is also making the book available.
ìThat's my main goal for writing the book is to help other families, women and children. I write a lot about ways children cope in these bad situations and for me it was an imaginary friend. If (others) can see something in the book that helps them change their life or make a different decision, that would be very worthwhile,î she said.
Mytton also writes about forgiveness and the important part it plays in the healing process.
ìI found through volunteering that that's a place where people get stuck. They can't do the forgiveness. I'm hoping that (the book) will help somebody find a way because people do walk around with this all their lives sometimes, this resentment and animosity,î she said.
Copies of the book are available by calling 403-343-2719.
