Tongue in cheek, as the new leader of the new, very new New Conservative Party of Canada (NCPC), I will order our Boys and Girls Scouts, our Mounties and our armed forces, our navy consisting of several hundred canoes; our army composed of several hundred horsemen with swords, spears and bows, and our air forces consisting of the First World War and Second World War war planes to annex Alaska, Guam, Puerto Rico, the U.S. Virgin Islands, Idaho, Montana, North Dakota, Minnesota, Michigan, the Great Lakes (renamed: The Canadian Great Lakes), and the St. Lawrence Seaway (renamed: The Sir John A. McDonald Seaway).
This military intervention is “necessary” to protect our national interests. Our “Manifest Destiny” to occupy North America for Canadians. We are “entitled” to acquire more land because we are an “exceptional people” - God’s chosen people. We are obligated to save Americans from themselves.
Many Americans want to have our public health-care system because health care is a right, not a privilege, and they won’t don’t go broke obtaining it. It’s cheaper, and they will live longer too.
Our new friends will love our educational system (higher academic standards) because they haven’t been undermined (not yet) by self-serving politicians and clergy (zealots/fanatics).
They will love the way we have protected our environment although the same zealots have been trying to undermine our pristine forests, rivers, streams, mountains, etc. for decades as money talks.
For example, the renewal of coal mining operations on the Eastern Slopes of the Canadian Rockies despite unanimous oppositions from ranchers, farmers, environmentalists, the tourist industry, etc.
They will also like that our judicial system hasn’t been bought (not yet) by billionaires (Elon Musk, Mark Zuckerberg, Donald Trump, Bezos, etc).
Our new neighbours will also like our elections that have not been bought (not yet) by political actions committees and billionaires, and they will like that our election campaigns last only 30-35 days, compared to U.S. elections that occurred every two years costing billions of dollars.
Who do you think pays for all those elections?
They will also like that our local governments haven’t been taken over by partisan politics (not yet anyway). Just look at how chaotic and non-functional they have become south of the border.
Yes, many American will “love” to be annexed (saved) by our wonderful government with its parliamentary system.
The joys of having more than two political parties to choose from, but we will probably have to build a wall (Trump will pay for it of course) to keep out the millions of Americans who will want to migrate north to the "Promise Land."
Oh, and our new citizens will love the Canada Pension Plan and Old Age Security because they won’t have to worry that political and religious zealots will try to undermine our social safety network like we see every year with in America - Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid. Not yet anyway.
And they will love that their tax money isn’t being wasted on expensive, fancy military toys - F-35s, tanks, subs and multi-billion dollar aircraft carriers, etc. at the expense of public education, public health care, social programs, and pensions. Hallelujah!
George Thatcher,
Olds
